Blackout

My world had suddenly become sort of dark and muted the other night.

No, my eyes and ears are perfectly fine, I’m actually talking about the repeated incident as in the unscheduled power outage in my neighbourhood...which happened like for the millionth times already in the past few months...Bloody Hell!

So for a night, i had no electricity, no annoying sound from the TV set, no mechanical noise from the spinning fan, no buzzing fluorescent lights from overhead the ceiling, no unbearably loud humming from the freezer.

Nothing but pitch-black all around me, which, quite unexpectedly, brought out some sense of peacefulness in me.

At that very moment, nothing seemed to matter anymore, the world were only as real as the little candle light in front of me, the ticking alarm clock in my room, and the sound of my heartbeat.

Sounds like a perfect time to lie down on my back and reflect on life.

Hence, better leave me alone, you blood-sucking damn bug-mosquito! Unless you think you could endure the attack of my enormous palm, which will not be hesitate to slap the gut outta your bug’s butt! You hear me!?

Sunday

There are probably a handful of more important things in life that i should be directing my attention to right this moment.

And i’m sure there are at least a million things out there that i could sink my teeth into for some well-deserving fun.

But instead, i chose nothing but to blank-out my mind, rest my body in the comfort of a bed, not moving a single muscle and tries to get acquainted with the sound waves that flow out of the stereo set.

Now.

Lazy Sunday afternoon indeed.

Screwed-up Clock

This is such a huge, sickening, vicious cycle of life, really.

I am too alert to be asleep at night,
And too sleepy to stay awake by day.

I’m convinced now,

that my bloody biological clock is playing lame tricks on my mind.

Argh!

Damn you, leave me alone, I want my normal routine back.

Would things be any different?

If i keep my arms wide open for all those people around me?

If i quit being so pretentious and hide my true self behind a fake disguise?

If i speak only my mind instead of whatever i think is more appropriate to be said at times?

Should i lower my guard and take myself less seriously?

Should i learn not to be so self-conscious?

Could these thoughts a harmless feeling of self-doubt, or a testimony to my social-retardness?

Yes? No? Maybe?

I don’t know.

Quote of the Day--陶吉吉《自導自演的悲劇 How Long》

I always have a soft spot for songs—those sad, tearful, help-me-i-am-drowning kinda songs.

~ 都是我。。。~

It comforts me in ways i could never really explain.

~ 自導自演的悲劇 ~

Perhaps i feel less isolated whenever i detect a sense of sorrowness coming from any other soul besides myself.

~ 如果我真心愛妳　該有快樂結局　
....怪我不懂珍惜　把妳推向他 ~

So i guess, by feeling less isolated, i would in turn feel more comfortable with myself, knowing that there is a good chance i may not be alone in this matter afterall.

~ 如果我真心愛妳　能否改變結局
....還是不懂珍惜　又搞砸一切 ~

It sort of like having a best-of-friend around, except that unlike human being, the sound of music will never leaves, not to mention the possibility of having them whenever, wherever and however long i could possibly want. All it takes is just a gentle push on the PLAY button.

~ 我來不及　改編結局
....這是我　自導自演的悲劇 ~

Let’s listen to this-

~ 是妳 ~

It was sung by 陶吉吉.

~ 是我 ~

And it's called 《自導自演的悲劇 How Long》

~只能怪自己 ~

It is so......ME.